Fields of Gold
by angel of the night666
Summary: A fic based on the song. E/B rated M


**Just a little something I wrote for fun. The song is "Fields of Gold" originally preformed by Sting, but this version was based off listening to Lisa Kelly's version**

****

AN: I do not own Twilight or "Fields of Gold"

_You'll remember me where the west wind blows_

_Among the fields of barley_

_You'll forget the sun in his jealous sky_

_As we walk in fields of gold_

How could it end like this? It seemed like they had only just begun. Their time was so limited and now there was nothing. Nothing to change her or keep her alive. Or so she thought. Her hand rested on her stomach as she waited for the doctor to deliver her fate. Was this the blessing that she had been waiting for or the curse that could destroy her?

Bella closed her eyes fighting back tears. He really was gone now. Edward wouldn't return from the fight, from the war that tore them apart. She would never be able to tell him that she loved him again. He would never smile at her again. Not even at her expense. She would never hear him laugh. His eyes would no longer bear into her soul and know that she was suffering. No one could do that but him.

She could picture him as clear as day, as if he was standing right in front of her. His copper hair spiked even though it wasn't what all the other guys were doing. His smile, the smile that caused her heart to flutter, reached his emerald eyes, causing them to sparkle. He always had a hint of five o'clock shadow, making him look rugged and tough. His broad shoulders gave way to a muscular chest that led to the six pack that he said he kept just for her.

Bella opened her eyes. The doctor was standing at the door with a smile on her face. He sat across from her and started, "Congratulations Mrs. Cullen, you're pregnant."

Bella smiled. The first true smile since he left. She looked down at her stomach, at the slight bulge that held her future. But it was a future that wouldn't be shared with her husband. Her child would never know the amazing father he or she had, and Edward would never know the child he helped create.

Bella felt a tear slip from her eyes. She had to stop thinking about him. It wasn't going to bring him back. But she could still remember the summer they spent together in their field…

_So she took her love for to gaze awhile_

_Among the fields of barley_

_In his arms she fell as her hair came down _

_Among the fields of gold_

"Edward, where are we going?"

Edward glanced over at her, his eyes holding an impish twinkle. He smirked, "You'll see, it's a surprise."

"You know I hate surprises," Bella muttered under her breath, but loud enough for Edward to hear her. His smirk broadened and he kept driving further and further away from their little town. He moved one of his hands off the steering wheel and held hers. Her eyes went from staring aimlessly out the window to watching him shyly from under her lashes. She couldn't help but smile at him, he made it impossible to stay mad at him.

Edward suddenly turned and began driving on a dirt road, that Bella hadn't even noticed before. She opened her mouth to say something, but thought better of it. He wasn't going to give her any information about where they were going. He stopped and turned off the car.

"Where are we?" she asked. It just seemed like an open field.

Edward got out of his truck before he answered, and was helping her out without a word.

"This place is ours. A place for us to escape the rest of the world."

She stood in the circle of his arms gazing into his eyes. Edward was ever the romantic. He was always going out of his way to give her flowers or to let her know that she was loved. It was just the way he was. He went around to the bed of the truck and pulled out a blanket and a picnic basket. He spread the blanket and pulled her on the ground next to him. They began to eat and talk, but Bella felt as if there was something that Edward wasn't telling her.

"Edward, you don't seem alright," she started. "What's wrong?

She was looking up at him, her back being pressed against his chest. He didn't meet her gaze. He was staring into the endless field.

"Bella," he whispered. It was almost impossible to hear him. "Bella, I've enlisted."

She pulled away from him, almost as if she had been burned.

"You did what?" she demanded. Edward looked down at the ground and repeated, "I've enlisted."

Bella felt tears sting her eyes. She couldn't believe it. That fact was like a nightmare brimming in her mind. Only one word escaped her lips, "Why?"

Edward took a deep breath. "I felt like I needed to. You know more than anyone how much I've wanted to join the army. This is my chance to make a difference."

His eyes met hers, begging her to accept this and to support him. She was terrified, and turned away from him. In a breathless whisper she said, "I'm gonna lose you."

Edward was silent. With this particular war, he knew as well as she did the odds of coming home. It was a war that so many men lost their lives and his could very well be one of them. The one thing Edward never did was make a promise he couldn't keep.

Wordlessly, he pulled her into his arms again. He lowered his lips to hers. Bella clung to him knowing what he wanted and for the first time, one hundred percent ready to give that to him. She pulled away slightly and whispered, "Make love to me."

Edward stared down at her for a moment before crushing his lips against hers. Bella moaned when she felt his tongue part her lips and explore her mouth. She had fooled around with Edward in the past but neither of them let it progress far. Now both of them realized that every little moment counted and they did not want to waste them.

Edward wrapped his arms around her waist and rolled her beneath him. His lips moved to memorize her jaw and neck as he began to unbutton her blouse. He removed the garment and his hands ran over the newly exposed skin, tracing each delicate curve. Bella arched into him and began to lift the t-shirt he wore. Edward moved away from her for only a moment, to pull the offending shirt off, but was back kissing and touching her.

Edward's hands moved behind her to unclasp the bra she wore. He pulled back to watch as he remove the article of clothing that kept her hidden. Bella had to say that a shot of feminine pride ran through her when Edward's eyes darkened in what could only be lust. Noticing that he was tentative to touch her, she took his hand in hers and placed it on her breast. She gasped and whispered, "Please, Edward, love me."

His eyes became tender as his hand moved in a gentle caress, causing her to arch into him. He lowered his head to her other breast closing it around her hardened nipple. Bella moaned and her fingers tangled in his hair holding him to her. Edward growled against her skin in approval and his free hand began to lift her skirt. He moved between her legs when her skirt was bunched up against her hips and pressed his growing arousal against her. Bella gasped, realizing how large he was and felt a bit nervous.

That nervousness disappeared however, when Edward tore off her panties and his fingers began to explore her folds. Bella cried out his name when he sunk a single finger into her core.

"Jesus, Bella," Edward cursed, hovering over her. The hand that had been at her breast, now holding her in an arch. "You're so wet and hot."

Bella moved her hips in time with his finger and moaned when she felt another finger enter her. She clung to his shoulders as she fell victim to the tidal wave of pleasure washing over her. Edward whispered words of love and desire in her ear, and she felt herself come undone. She screamed as she felt her muscles clench around his finger and Edward gathered her in his arms when she recovered.

When her breathing evened out, she pushed Edward so he was lying on his back. She kissed him and her hands trailed down his muscled chest. When she reached the buckle of his belt she fumbled with it. Edward was making it hard, his hands running along her back. Bella finally pulled the belt off and began to undo his jeans. She felt his erection spring free and glanced down. She was right about him being large.

She swallowed the nervous lump in her throat and tried to remember what she heard her friends explain about pleasing a man. She kissed down his chest as her hand wrapped around his length. Edward groaned and kicked his jeans and boxers off. Bella continued moving down his body until she got to his arousal. She hoped that she could do this right. Her tongue peaked out of her mouth and ran along his length from base to tip. Edward bolted upright, but Bella knew he was enjoying it by the look in his eyes.

"Bella you don't have to…" She cut him off by taking him into her mouth. She bobbed her head up and down, licking and sucking as she went. Edward's hands tangled in her chestnut hair, guiding her along him. He was moaning her name and shuddering above her. He suddenly pulled her off him and Bella wondered if she did something wrong.

"You are amazing," Edward whispered, kissing her harder than he had before. "But when I cum, I want to be inside you."

Bella smiled as Edward rolled her beneath him again. He pulled the skirt off her and positioned himself at her entrance. He paused.

"You're sure you want this?" he asked. Bella nodded. She thought that she would be afraid at this moment, or at least a little nervous. Instead, she was excited, and knew that this was right beyond a doubt. Propriety be damned.

Edward began to push himself into her and Bella bit her lip. It wasn't exactly painful, just odd. She felt like she was being stretched from the inside out. Edward reached her barrier and paused. With another nodded from Bella, he completely sheathed himself inside her with one thrust, breaking her barrier and causing her to cry out.

Edward stilled, allowing her to adjust to having him inside her. When Bella felt the pain fade, she lifted her hips, silently telling him that she was okay. Edward began to thrust into her slowly, not wanting to hurt her, but soon she was calling for him to move faster and harder. Edward was happy to oblige. Soon he was pounding into her, causing Bella to scream his name in absolute ecstasy. She quickly came around him milking him and scratching his shoulders. This caused Edward to let go, spilling inside her a soothing warmth.

Edward suddenly stood and Bella was about to question why, until he pulled another blanket from the back of his truck. Soon he was pulling her into his arms, wrapping the blanket around their bodies. She smiled at him and whispered, "I love you."

"I love you too, Bella."

_Will you stay with me will you be my love_

_Among the fields of barley_

_We'll forget the sun in his jealous sky_

_As we lie in fields of gold_

_We'll lie in fields of gold_

Edward had two months before he had to report for basic training. Those two months were spent with Bella and in their field. One day they sat together in the field as the sun began to set. He kept making excuses to spend time with her and to keep her out as late as he possibly could. For once her parents didn't care. They knew that Edward was leaving and that Bella wanted to spend as much time with him before he left her for good. They simply looked the other way when she didn't come home until an ungodly hour in the morning.

Bella rested her head against her lover's shoulder as his hand began to rub her back. She looked up at him and kissed his cheek. They had a month left together and Edward wished that he could stop time. He never thought that it would be impossible to leave her behind. It was almost impossible to believe that he was so for this and didn't think about her at the time.

Edward suddenly turned to her and asked, "Will you marry me?"

There was a shadow of doubt in her eyes, almost as if wasn't sure that she heard him right.

"Do you mean it?"

"Why wouldn't I?" he replied. "I love you and I want to know that you're mine and I can come back to you."

His fingers brushed the hair behind her ear and he gently kissed her. She was still silent. She was eighteen and wasn't sure if she was ready to get married.

"If you don't want to I understand," he stuttered, nervously. "I mean we're young and if you're not sure I can-"

Bella kissed him, effectively cutting off his rant. She pulled away from him and whispered, "Of course I'll marry you."

He smiled and pulled her into his tight embrace. He crushed his lips against hers and pulled her up so she was standing. He lifted her in his arms and spun her around. He set her down and pulled a ring from his pocket. He slipped it on her finger and she asked, "How long have you been carrying this around?"

"Long enough."

_I never made promises lightly_

_And there have been some that I've broken_

_But I swear in the days still left_

_We'll walk in fields of gold_

_We'll walk in fields of gold_

It was their wedding day and neither could contain their excitement. Bella sat in the back with her father. He seemed more nervous than she did. He looked over at her and smiled. He sat next to her and pulled her into his arms.

"You know I love you right Bells?" he whispered.

"Of course daddy."

He kissed the top of her head and continued, "I'll always be here for you, no matter what."

Bella felt tears sting her eyes and she whispered, "I might need you now more than ever daddy."

He wiped her tears and tried to encourage her. "Edward loves you. It's easy to see in his eyes. Don't you think if I doubted that he loved you I'd let you marry him?"

"I just don't want him to go."

"Don't think about that now. Think now you're getting married to the man of your dreams and you two have the world at your feet."

Bella smiled at her father and hugged him one last time before the march began to play.

After the ceremony Bella and Edward walked into the home that was to be theirs. He carried her across the threshold and immediately into their bedroom. He gently placed her on the bed and kissed her.

"I can't believe that you're actually mine," he whispered against his skin.

"I'll always be yours Edward. Not even death will take that away," she replied running her hands through his hair.

Edward pulled away to stare down at her. She couldn't believe how different he looked today. His hair was slicked back and for once he was wearing a suit. He looked older than the nineteen years he had. His eyes stared into hers and his hand came up to cup her cheek.

"I'll always be with you. Even if-"

"Edward, not now."

"Yes now. I don't know if I'll have the courage to say it otherwise."

He took a deep breath.

"Even if I die over there, I'll always be with you. As long as you remember me. I'm not telling you to stay hung up on me if I'm dead and gone. Just remember me. If you're happy then I can know that I did my job. You know all I want is your happiness and if you're miserable because of me, I won't be able to be at peace."

"You keep talking like you're going to die," Bella replied. "There's always a chance that you'll come back."

Edward looked away. She felt tears escape from her eyes. This couldn't happen. Not now. She cupped his cheek forcing him to look at her.

"Not tonight. Tonight we're a normal couple and you're not going away. Not tonight."

She kissed him and the past and future were forgotten.

_Many years have past since those summer days_

_Among the fields of barley_

_See the children run as the sun goes down_

_Among the fields of gold_

_Among the fields of gold_

Now her boys were seven years old. Emmet and Jake had been a handful, but a blessing. She had to say she was not expecting two children, but was happy none the less. Being twins it was almost impossible to tell them apart. The only thing that gave them away were their eyes. Emmet had the same green eyes as his father, while Jake's were the same shade of blue as hers. Both inherited Edward's dark messy hair and his ability for getting into trouble. It was obvious that they were each other's best friend and she wouldn't have it any other way.

Bella sat on a blanket in the field as she watched the boys play with some of the other children. The other couples watched on also. One thing she couldn't stand was how they pitied her and her sons. Yes she felt bad for her sons that they were growing up without a father, but to pity her, that was absurd. She spent the best years of her life with Edward and while he was still gone, she'd find signs that he was watching over the family he so longed to have.

Suddenly the boys were in her arms, both laughing and causing her to laugh as well. She was blessed, she knew it. She had two boys that loved her and an angel watching over her.

"Mommy, guess what we found," Emmet said, excitement lacing every syllable. Jake looked just as excited.

"What did you find sweetheart?"

The Jake pulled a single rose from behind his back. There were no thorns and there was no possible way that the rose could have been there long, since it didn't show the slightest hint of drying out.

"Are you sure one of the girls didn't bring it?" Bella asked, hoping that the boys didn't take it from someone.

"No mommy, we asked," Jake stated. "Nobody brought it, so we thought you'd like it."

They handed it to her proudly, like some big discovery. A bittersweet smile came to Bella's lips. There was no way that this was Edward. It just couldn't be. It was too tangible. And yet something inside her made her think of the man she loved more than anything.

Emmet oblivious of his mother's dilemma began to explain how they found it. "We were playin' tag with the other kids mom and Jake tripped over a rock."

"It was right in front of me!" Jake shouted obviously excited to join in the story. Bella listened to them until they fell silent. They looked a little somber and Bella asked them what was wrong.

"Do…do you think that daddy wanted us to find this?" Jake asked. Bella didn't have a response and Emmet added, "I think he did. I think he wanted us to give it to you."

"Maybe he did." That was the best answer she could give her sons right now. "Now go play with your friends."

The boys ran off again and she stared off into red glow of the setting sun.

_You'll remember me where the west wind blew_

_Among the fields of barley_

_You'll forget the sun in his jealous sky _

_As we walk in fields of gold_

There wasn't much she could do to ease the pain of the boys not knowing their father. She couldn't work miracles. She tried dating others, but even the boys told her to stop. They, like Edward could tell when she was trying to do what she didn't want to in order to please others. They, also like Edward, didn't want her pretending. They were content with just a mother, not having known anything else.

For Bella though it was that much harder. She knew what she lost and no one could take that pain away. There were times when she felt like a ghost, walking through her life without living it. It was her boys that kept her going, even thought she never got closure. His body was never found and all she got was a folded flag and a life insurance check. Who could expect that to fill the hole in her heart.

All she had left was their field and her memory. There were days when she would drop the kids off at a friend's house and visit the field alone. It was often abandoned and it was there that she could find her peace. There no one stared and no one whispered _There's Edward Cullen's widow. Why did she marry him? They were so young. Shame, she had her whole life ahead of her and he stole it. _They didn't understand. When you were in love it lasted forever, even if the one you loved was gone. She believed in an afterlife, and knew Edward was waiting for her.

Now she knew why people held on when it seemed like everything was ripped away. There was always something to hold on to. For her it was her family, and that would always ease the pain that never faded.

_We walked in fields of gold…_

_We walked in fields of gold…_

Did a place have a memory? Or did it forget with the seasons? Did the field remember the young couple unwilling to face the consequences of a decision that seemed so simple? Did it remember whispered words of love and hope? Maybe it did. Maybe not.

Bella stood alone in the field as the sun set. Sometimes she forgot she was alone. Sometimes it really felt like Edward was walking beside her. She could almost fell his hand in hers again.

He had kept his promise. She wasn't alone. She had her sons that were just like their father. She knew he was never far. He was just a breath away making sure she and the boys she knew he would have loved were safe. She could still walk with him even though she couldn't see him.

* * *

**There you have it.**

* * *


End file.
